Are you psychic? Any links?

Isn't the bloke from Schalke a left back, or LB as American called the position?

Tony Edams?

As I thought, more regurgitated bolloxs..........

Ornstein is as reliable as they come when it comes to confirming transfers that are nearly done. He rarely breaks any stories early, but if he's saying it's close it probably is close.

I'd love that to be true....................

Arsenal have released 19-year old Swedish defender Kristopher Da Graca from the club.
He becomes player number 8 to leave the club this season.

Emmental Eboue?

I absolutely will change my stance on this as soon as we lose a game.

Dragging the bottom of the barrel aren't you?

Should we be interested in anyone that wasn't in last years squad or like Sanogo used to be?

Has the tea lady left?

Gouda Strachan?

EDIT: Sage Diaby?

'Monterey Jack' Wilshere?

You can be a right miserable sod bubblechris. Lighten up. Now where are your cheese-based footballers to give us a bit of entertainment?

Camembert Trautmann

Why wait until then? Best to get into the negative swing of things well before any games are played. It sets you up nicely for the season ahead and the awful predictability of underperforming in the league against small-time, under-spending clubs like Chelsea, United, City, Liverpool and Spurs. An early exit from FA Cup-Half Empty competition will feel all that much better too.

Diego marscapone?
Duncan Gruyere?
Freddie Limberger

Shall I go on?

I doubt there are many link, sensory or esp.

Santi Camborzola

Brien Laudrup?

Le Saint-Raymond Parlour?

Wish he'd joined us when we were at Highbrie...

I can't believe Wenger didn't sign N'golo Comté before he went to Leicester.

An even bigger miss was the Chelsea legend Gianfranco Gorgonzola.

Who could ever forget Geoff Seriously Strong.

What....no Mozzarella or Cheddar?

Gidday Brom ... I like the Tour de France ..... the scenery is great

and it's somehow nice sitting back in the comfort of a lounge chair with a coffee and a muffin watching a bunch of guys straining ligaments , lungs etc etc as they make their way up the foothills of the Pyrenees .

Transfer window Lacezette will join tomorrow , next week , next month , next year .... we had the same last year with Benzema .

Gidday Kiwi. Agreed, love the mountain stages when these blokes really have to push to the limit. I also enjoy these survival type programmes where someone is freezing their nuts off in the arctic or alternatively fending off enormous insects in some godforsaken jungle with 100% humidity. Watching other people suffer (when it's their choice of course) is always entertaining.
Bernard, just to keep you up to date, today the Tour de France is leaving Germany and heading for Belgium

I can see you now at the Palace, badly bib and tuckered, Sir Les Patterson style, telling Liz and Phil they are too old for the job and asking for an update on their KPIs and Business Plan.

You are now starting to share the dream. I knew I would get through if I persisted. It has not gone unnoticed by me that you refer to them as Liz and Phil - I smell a family connection here. Cousins or second cousins or just close friends. Or did you meet them at the fox hunt - Sir Chipps is that you?

"Arsenal tell Alexis Sanchez he will not be joining Manchester City as Arsene Wenger refuses to sell stars to rivals

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/footba ... z4leq44pmf

Choice 1 AW sticks to his guns and refuses to sell Sanchez. We lose £50million and Sanchez sits out the early games.

Choice 2 AW is forced to sell Sanchez and AW leaves the club in protest.

What would you prefer?

If it's leaving Germany the quality of the tracks will fall. Let's hope we beat Chile later today to make up for it. Talking of Chile, I didn't know they had stages of the Tour de France in South America. I know the Amazon jungle doesn't extend to Chile, but when does it go to South America so the bike riders can spend their time "fending off enormous insects in some godforsaken jungle with 100% humidity." The only jungle I've heard of in France is the Calais jungle, which was simply a name given to a migrant camp there.

EDIT: Actually I've just had a brilliant idea. Move the whole bike ride to Germany and call it the 'Reise von Deutschland'. The uphill bit could be done in the Alps instead of the Pyrenees. Add a bit of class to it.

Number 2. Losing £50m so he can join City next summer on a free transfer looks pure idiocy to me especially, unless something quite astonishing happens, as I doubt we'll win the Premier League whether Sanchez stays or goes. I'd say that even if Wenger doesn't leave the club in protest, although that would be an added bonus.

Funny enough my real-life surname (as opposed to this cybershow) has a royal connection, but apart from some of our Irish posters, I suspect I am the least monarchist of anybody on here.

As good old Tom Paine noted in his Business Plan aka Common Sense: 'There is another and great distinction for which no truly natural or religious reason can be assigned, and that is the distinction of men into KINGS and SUBJECTS. Male and female are the distinctions of nature, good and bad the distinctions of Heaven; but how a race of men came into the world so exalted above the rest, and distinguished like some new species, is worth inquiring into, and whether they are the means of happiness or of misery to mankind...To the evil of monarchy we have added that of hereditary succession; and as the first is a degradation and lessening of ourselves, so the second, claimed as a matter of right, is an insult and imposition on posterity. For all men being originally equals, no one by birth could have a right to set up his own family in perpetual preference to all others for ever, and tho' himself might deserve some decent degree of honours of his contemporaries, yet his descendants might be far too unworthy to inherit them. One of the strongest natural proofs of the folly of hereditary right in Kings, is that nature disapproves it, otherwise she would not so frequently turn it into ridicule, by giving mankind an ASS FOR A LION.'

Windsor is my bet for hoy's real life surname.

More likely something ending in gina. Regina maybe?

Middle names Victoria and Albert

Bernard, I'm not sure you read my post correctly. Still, you may have stumbled on a great idea to have an 'amazon jungle stage' of the Tour. The dense undergrowth, killer snakes etc would certainly test the riders. I'll email the organisers.

Does it go to Wales. A Welshman won the first stage and now wears the famous yellow jersey.

After yesterday's one day final I'm just pleased his name presumably isn't Hales. Actually Alex Hales was born in Hillingdon, firmly Middlesex country. Sounds like the scouts at both my football and cricket clubs are equally crap.

Excluding Hodd, of course.

No prizes for guessing yours ......... either Battenberg or Schicklgruber