You my friend are the ingredient this forum has been missing.

A veritable pornstar martini of words so othat speak. You've already surpassed the current holder to become my favourite poster.

You should go for a pint one day with American gooner and have a competition to "out nutter" each other

Bravo keep it up

I was one of the many who absolutely loved the Wembley performance and most certainly did not want us to lose beforehand, so don't tar me with that brush.

However, I do think that it partially papered over the cracks of what had been a very poor season littered with some very poor and embarassing performances. It gave the club just enough wriggle room to announce Wenger staying without a huge outcry from fans.

I see we are now being quite strongly linked with Lacazette. His goal record in France is very impressive but I still don't get the bit where he's not a nailed on starter for France, not even in the squad sometimes.

Could it just be tht he isn't better than Antoine Griezmann?

Maybe, I would have expected a man with his goal record to have more than 11 caps at 26 though.

He is quick, mobile and a great finisher so perhaps, like Wrighty, he's a victim of circumstances and has not has the international recognition his talent deserves.

Let's hope so.

Imo I hope we get him. He will be ale to play with the team with or without Olivier. Some don't like him but he is productive and scores goals. A good coach would use him in the right setup. Similarly i think we should hold on to Walcott. He has been a regular scorer season after season and needs to play in the right setup.

Both have a better attitude than Alexi who could have been our greatest ever player had he not sold his soul.

There's an article today that says we can't give big pay rises to Sanchez and Özil as we could be charged by the FA or FIFA . Can't recall where but someone must have seen it.

There is hope for us next year but we still need a great coach. Without we'll just keep going groundhog day even if AW leaves tomorrow.

found it

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/footba ... rules.html

It's not personal, just a comment on how I see it. Yes there were a few poor performances, but not embarrassing ones. It's only football.

Palace 0-3, West Brom 1-3, Liverpool 1-3, Watford 1-2, Bayern x 2 1-5.

How the *%^@ could you not be embarrassed?

yeah ...... I knew I was inviting that .

Once you stop thinking about that stuff Brom ....you might as well cash in your chips .

Not meant to be smutty , but I laughed when an uncle of mine [ he was 90 at the time ] went to visit a dying friend in hospital

"Is there anything I can get you Agnes " [ she 89 ] ...thinking grapes , fruit juice , chocs , a book .

"You know Alf ....... I'd love a bl***dy good shag "

It's football. It is not that important.

I't's all a matter of perspective .

Check out the daily routine ....... opening the cat food , then don the coat and scarf for a leisurely walk to buy the paper .

Home again via the canal to admire the ducks going about their business among the old car tyres , shopping trolleys , plastic bags and McDonalds wrappers .

11 am ..... in between verses of "Goodnight Irene " while knocking up a dozen jars of chutney from vegies her brother gave them "Waste not want not " is the golden rule in the Hoy household , Mrs Hoy announces 'I've made a cuppa "

Now it's major decision time ; to do the Easy Sudoku now while sipping his tea or leave it till later ...

Hmmmm that's a tough one .... but wisely he decides on the tea , two digestives and heads out to the garden shed to do battle with that recalcitrant rake handle , it's only taken two weeks so far but it will be a job well done when finished and a great source of pride .

Best leave the Sudoku for this evening .

In the afternoon in front of the fire he opens "Trustee from the Tool Room" .... he was delighted to find two Neville Shute novels he hadn't read at the last church bazaar . Three pages in he is sound asleep . Mrs Hoy enters and lovingly removes his glasses and adjusts his blanket .

Excitement levels race off the scale when one of his mates [ the one who spent the last week in hospital having his stomach pumped after Hoy's culinary efforts ] .....the famous paella , frittata , risotto or whatever the hell it was minus the rice

....and breathlessly announces Frank Worthington has come out of retirement and has signed for the Darts .

They are still mates by the way , he is of the same ilk as Hoy you don't break off a friendship over a trifling matter like a near death experience .

Arsenal lose to Bayern Munich 1 - 5 ..." okay well that's football life goes on ".

Arsenal beat arch rivals Chelsea , silverware for us stop them doing the double ...Halleluhah treats himself to to two small sherries .

Now you tell me who has it right .........Old Man ............ or Claude , TJ , Mo and all the other moaning doodles giving themselves an ulcer over affairs in which they have very little control ...?

Kiwi you made my week. I bet even Hoy laughed. Especially, most probably.

Good one Kiwi -apparently very funny apparently

I see the officials in the Lions - All Blacks game are sponsored by specsavers . Thoughts, Lomekian?

That was great Kiwi. I'm looking forward to reading your next project: A day in the life of Daz.

27 high rise tower blocks in 15 Local Authority areas failed Government cladding tests.

Many of them had work done by one Company.

Does Soc, was it him, still insist their assets should not be frozen?

Camden evacuate 800 tenants from their failed blocks.

Has anyone checked Hospitals and office blocks and what about hotels like Premier Inn that shot up in recent years?

Nothing to do with me.

Sorry Soc it wasn't you it was your nemesis Kiwi

Very ggod Kiwi. Can't wait for the movie to come out. Speculative titles: 'No Country For Old Farts'; 'Oldfinger' or 'Once Upon A Time There Was a Pest'.

So long as its not the day we beat United in the FA Cup Final. That would be embarrassing.

Arsenal will pay $56m for Lacazette
4 yr contract

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XfS5kBGBh00[/youtube]

Thanks Ash and Gaz .
Bored ..... I have penned little character assassinations on Daz in the past , and he about me .

All Blacks played terrible against the Lions and stuttered to a flattering win .

We are going well in the America's cup yachting but anyone thinking we will win , think again we haven't a prayer .

The Yanks must be the most anal bunch of pr**cks on the planet . They have no shame , win at all costs .

Last time out four years ago , they cancelled the race which would have given us the cup when we were four hundred metres from the finish and half a mile in front because in light winds the race had taken too long ... then they announced a few lay days flew in every expert on the planet redesigned the boat and won .

This time in Bermuda , they arranged to have their compound in a fortified location , while the Kiwis are in plan sight of every Tom , Dick and Harry ...Ellison has boats cruising back and forth photographing everything we do .
He has taken us to court to try and have us disqualified because of the ingenious way we crank the hydraulics
They just had five days off ...... changed their boat , brought in other crew members , tacticians .

It's same as we lose the first leg of our match v Bayern Munich so we bring in Messi , Ronaldo , Ramos and Vardy

.... then here's the clincher ..because they came out victorious in their preliminary round robin they awarded themselves one point to be carried through to the final .

One point is awarded for every race win , first to seven takes the cup ..... so the Kiwis were behind before the first race was run .

Imagine Federer wins Queens Club so if he makes the final at Wimbledon he gets a four game head start . or because Germany won the last world cup if they make the final of the next one they start one goal to the good over their opponents .

We've won five races but we only have four points ......due to their awarding themselves a point beforehand ...... unbelievable .

You've got the symbol for dollars. Do you mean dollars, or euros or pounds? If it's £56m, that seems very expensive. But $56m seems moderately reasonable at approaching £44m. €56m, which is £49m, is obviously around mid-way between the other two prices.

I'd like to see us make a serious offer to Schalke for Goretzka. A talented midfielder who isn't a midget.

Now the English press is publishing fake news just to get my hopes up

http://www.express.co.uk/sport/football ... nzini-News

Theo to Westham rumour.

Goretzka is a great shout, I hope we have a serious interest in him. Reminds me a little of Vieira. Also, whilst I hope we get Lacazette, I'm not sure I want Giroud to leave. Lacazette might get in behind with his pace and score those types of goals which is great. But if Giroud leaves then our aerial threat and plan b is gone. We'll lose an asset that has often been underrated especially against packed defences when pace can't always be used. Set piece threat too.

I hope the link for Martial is serious but Mourinho will never sell him. The only way that happens is if Martial tries force a move, can't see that happening or Mourinho wants someone else and is not happy with him.

Man Utd fans are having a bit of fun with the link. We owe them some misery for what they did for RvP.

http://www.talkingbaws.com/2017/06/man- ... l-reports/

Liking the Lacazette rumors. I think it will happen.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=71z0P9ZnwWU

In the Philippines on vacation and a friend of the girl I went to a club with is from Dundee, Scotland and maybe he had too much alcohol but I couldn't understand a word he said. The accent is not nearly as strong as a Glasgow accent but almost as hard to follow. He is also a Dundee United fan, which I assumed and he was shocked an American knew that.

I see it as a shame when players leave just short of a century of Arsenal goals. As you've pointed out here previously, Merson left when he had scored 99 times for Arsenal. I think Giroud has 98 goals for Arsenal, and I'd be sad to see him also leave just before he joins Arsenal's 100 club. Overall I agree with your point, but there are significant negatives about Giroud. At his best he reminds me of Alan Smith. But at his worst he reminds me of Lee Chapman. Regrettably he seems to be in Chapman mode quite a lot of the time.

Wenger has to make some tough decisions if he's to move the squad forward, PL wage spending rules mean we can only increase our wage bill by a certain amount (7%?) and if we extend Özil or Sanchez deals just one of them will probably take up most of that.

If we can offload Walcott to the hammers then I say go for it, he's on £110-140K a week depending on which source to believe, he did score a lot of goals last season but his all round game is average and I still don't think Wenger really knows whether he's a winger or a striker, frankly I don't think anyone does!, at 28 and so reliant on his pace he's not going to get better and will probably go downhill in the next few years.

Giroud is a good plan B but if he wants to start then he needs to go as well, all his best performances are from the bench and if he cannot accept that then tough decision time Arsene, prove you have a ruthless streak. There are younger options out there who will undoubtedly have more pace than Giroud if not quite his other strengths.

Not sure on the Ox, he did well for half of last season but how long have we waited for that?, I do like him but if he's holding out for crazy money and other teams are happy to pay him £150k+ then I think we might be better off looking for other options, especially in MF, there is also a touch of the "Walcott's" about playing well just before your contract is up..

I don't know how losing both Ox and Walcott would affect our home grown quota though, especially as Gibbs is also likely to move on and Wilshere and Szczesny's future are still undecided, we may not have any English players left at this rate!.

You must have missed the news, Arsene signed a new contract. Thinking we will have a "plan B" is just naive.

Giroud has scored a huge amount of headed goals since he arrived. I've forgotten if he's first or second highest in the headed goals record over the last five years but it's an aspect we severely lacked on before his arrival. And don't forget how useful he has been as a sub. It's a great option to have. Between Lacazette if he signs and if Theo and Alexis stay, not much height there. Wellbeck is decent in the air but misses so much football.

I'm not Giroud's biggest fan and wouldn't be that upset if he left but we would be losing a certain type of threat.

I like Giroud...for what he is. I think he gets slated for being something he never was. I think he maximized his skills with us. He was not a big name, he was one of Wenger's roll of a dice. Giroud got the fans ire initially for not being RvP. That's Wenger's fault. Giroud was never going to be able to replace or come anywhere close to being a replacement for RvP. He did the best he could with what God gave him. He was never known for his pace but gets slated for it. I think he turns difficult chances in to goals and as Sabir says as added headed goals to our 'arsenal' of threats. You get him the ball in the 6 yard box on the ground or air and he converts them at a more than decent rate. I would trust Giroud in the box more than any other Arsenal player save Sanchez.

I hope he stays BUT not at the expense of us not buying a top, top striker. We need adequate back up.The fact that Wenger has gone this long without buying a top striker is the real problem and a lot of fans are taking it out on Giroud unfairly.

You missed he irony. I am one of the most pro-giroud people on this forum however, for reasons that escape me, we never truly play to his strengths (aka the plan B).

An Alexis/Aguero sway being touted.

Can't see it myself. At his age, why would Aguero want to swap City for a team not in the CL? Unless he wants to live in London.

He knows that Wenger is as soft as putty and won't criticise him. He has a few medals already and will move into semi retirement.

According to Sky Sports it's £56m. So pounds sterling, not euros or US dollars.

EDIT: Elsewhere is says £48.7m, which is the euros option for the higher figure.

As you say, I can't see it happening but Sanchez is 28, Aguero is 29. They may be thinking they'd cut him in a year or so anyway. Sanchez is 'fit as a butcher's dog' (haha...love that Brit saying I learned from you lot) as you all say, Aguero is a bit more injury prone.

ZZZZ